Update from Galveston

So Totsie's surgery went very well this morning. We arrived at the hospital around 7 am, and got her all checked in. About 8:15ish, they came to get her to take her down to the nuclear medicine department. They injected some dye into her left side so that they could check to see if the cancer had invaded the lymph nodes. If so, they would just go ahead and remove them while they had her cut open.

Mom and I were sitting the waiting room when I happened to notice Totsie rollin' on by, so Mom got up to go catch them, and I waited for John to come back so he would know where we were. By the time he got back, we were walking down the hall, and found out that Totsie had already been taken back to the holding area for surgery...three hours early! I don't know about your doctor, but i've neveer seen one be early like that!

If i hadn't seen her rolling down the hall, she might have been in and out of surgery before we even knew it! :-)

Dr. T was able to go in and remove all the cancer, and it had not invaded any lymph nodes that he could see at that point. Great news!

By the time she came out of recovery, she was talking and has done very well. She ate two meals, and has even walked to the bathroom a few times. Well, to the chair next to her bed. This room is literally so big, that they didn't want her to have to walk that far when she needed to go.

She started off in a room that was so small, only one person could barely fit in. This room has a love seat that folds out into a twin bed, a recliner, another small chair, a small table, an armoire, and the hospital bed. Not to mention the HUGE bathroom. :-)

We were all going to stay, but soon realized that the sleeping situation wouldn't allow for a comfy night's sleep. Mom and John went on back to the hotel, and I'm now here taking care of Totsie. She's done good for the most part. She's in some pain now, and we almost have to force her to take pain meds. :-/ Her body has been through a lot today for a 78 year old.

As I type this, I finally hear her snoring a bit, so she's finally getting some rest.

me? It's 1:12 am, and I'm not wide awake, but I'm definitely not tired enough to sleep now. I've probably had about 30 minutes so far.

Dr. T should be coming in around 8 am, and once he's been in to see her, she will be discharged. Hopefully, we'll be out of here by noon. :-)

That's it from here for now!

Please run over to Katie's blog to see the updates about Troy. I would post, but i want to be sensitive to anything that might be going on over there, and right now, I only get bits and peices after mom and Totsie talk to Aunt Tammy! I sure don't want to post any wrong information out there.

Thanks to each and every one of you for praying. Again, this is such a trying, difficult time for our family, but the power of prayer is truly amazing.

Devastation Restoration

Today, for the first time since Hurricane Ike, I drove through Galveston Island. As i drove past some of the devastation I was reminded of something. I've been angry at God lately for what He has been doing to our family. I mean, how much tragedy can one family handle? Today, I saw some homes that were completely destroyed, and obviously abandoned. In the midst of these homes were homes that were being rebuilt, and homes that had obviously been totally redone. Most of the roofs have been replaced.

I was reminded that this is so much like many of our personal lives. I imagined the totally devastated homes as those who have gone before us. Those who have passed, and are now enjoying that wonderful place called Heaven. Maybe the people who lived in these homes now have something newer. Nicer. better.

All around those who have gone are those who are being built back up. Restoring. Renewing, and going on with life. When they walk out of their house each day, they are constantly reminded of those no longer there, Just as we always think of those no longer with us.

I was reminded that even though life may seem like a hurricane right now, it will pass, and God will restore us. He's done it before, and will do it again. We may not know what God is doing, but He's got a plan. I have to just remember that.

I actually even smiled a little. :-)

I'd love to expound on this even more, but I'm right where I want and need to be right now, and don't want to spend too much time in front of this computer.

I'm with my mom and my grandmother and my husband, and I'm much better than I was this morning.

I will try to post some updates as the surgery takes place, and you can keep up with Troy's updates by reading Katie's (sister) blog. (Find her on my sidebar "Randomness of a Wannabe Mommy".

My heart is completely broken for her, knowing that she is experiencing what I had to experience 6 years ago.

Troy is now the same age as Jeremy was. *sigh*

Continue to pray. Totsie's surgery is Thursday morning at 9 am at John Sealy Hospital here in Galveston.

until then...signing off.

Hmmph...

Ok, remember the part last night where I said I haven't thought of baby in a month? Well, my medicinally induced "aunt flo" finally showed up today! I haven't seen her in 5 months. I suppose it's time to think baby again! :-)

Broken

I don't even know what to say, really.

I'm so torn apart right now, being so far away from my family. I feel guilty. They are all suffering together, and I'm over here - 6 hours away, feeling totally detached.

4 - yes... 4 of my family members have been stricken with this stupid thing that's killing everyone.

For the first time - I have started to question God. Why is He doing this? Why is He allowing my family to suffer? Why does He bring us up, give us hope, just so we can be let down again? Why does the end seem to near for someone who has barely had a chance to live life? I saw it happen to my brother, and i can't believe I'm seeing it with someone who is the exact same age.

I see my grandmother, who basically has had a pretty healthy life. Minor heart palpitations, and arthritis, but never anything life threatening. Why? Why now? Why her? I've seen her overcome the loss of a husband and a grandson within a few months. I've seen her overcome the loss of several life long friends. I've seen her overcome the loss of her home of 54 years. I will see her overcome this.

I went to EZ's today with John, and this mom came to the table next to us with a little boy who is obviously going through Chemotherapy. He looked so sick, but he seemed so happy. He couldn't have been more than 8-9 years old. I totally lost it sitting at the table. So completely overwhelmed with grief, and heartache and anger. I prayed for that boy as I walked out. I prayed that he would be healed of this terrible killer. I prayed that he wouldn't have to suffer like others have.

It's killing me to be over here. I want to be with my family. I want to see them before it's too late. I just want some time with them. You know how bad I want a baby? The thought has barely crossed my mind in a month. I've barely remembered to take the medication i'm using to jumpstart my body's cycle again. It just doesn't matter to me.

I don't know what I would do without the Oak Hills Staff. They have been like are my family here. They rally around me in prayer when they can't rally around my family. I always felt it kind of strange to lay a hand on someone or outstretch a hand to someone being prayed for - until they did it to me. That can be overwhelming in itself. It's like you can feel the Holy Spirit when people are praying. I have no issues now with outstretching a hand to someone in need.

Almost every day, I recieve an email, or just a kind word from at least 2-3 people on staff, asking me about someone specific in my family. Most of whom they've never met, but they ask about them by name. Wow. They are why I'm here. (Well, John is why I'm here, and not there, but they are a huge part of it too...)

i really don't know what else to say - except PRAY. PRAY. PRAY.

I pray for a peace for my family. I pray that whatever God's will is - that we somehow learn to accept it - good or bad. I am a believer that there is a reason for everything, even if there doesn't seem to be an answer.

remember...when you're praying for someone - it's ok to pray with an outstretched arm or a lifted hand.

God's still in control.

So cute!

I think I have the most precious nephew in the world! He came for a visit, and all of a sudden, Daisee started barking at him...We thought it would scare him, but we were wrong. He burst out into the CUTEST laughter!

The more Daisee barked, the more Nicholas laughed, and the more he laughed, the more she barked...it resulted the the following....



Man, I can't wait to hear my own baby laugh like that!

Drama meant for a Theater....

So, in John's "previous" life (aka: before Melissa), he worked Security at the Alamo Quarry Theaters on the weekends. John is like me, and is just very friendly to most people he meets. Sometimes, that friendliness can be taken as "flirtiness" instead, and then it can be a big mess. Why can't people just accept that people are being nice to them? Maybe because they crave that attention for some reason or another.

Well, I'll be the first to admit that my dear hubby is HOT in a security uniform. (What do you think drew me to him? hehe) Of course that meant he was getting hit on non-stop. (I witnessed it, either while I was on the phone with him, or while I was there, watching from the background...) He used to have this really bad habit of giving out his phone number to flirty girls who would approach him at the theater, while they were trying to get into a rated R movie... Once we met, he changed his phone number, so that no one could call him. :-)

Ok - to my real reason for this post...

Some adults are the most childish people. Ever. This one, though, actually falls in to the category of "pathetic" and Selfish.

There was this manager at The Quarry who had a huge crush on John. Did I say huge? I meant HUGE. Ginormous, obsessive. One night, when I went to meet him there on his break, she got all mad and stormed out. bleh. oh well.

John hasn't worked at the theater now since January of LAST YEAR. I think we've been back once since then to visit an officer he used to work with.

One of those officers called him last week and informed him of some very interesting news....are you ready???

That manager lady is pregnant. and she's telling people it's John's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe that?? What a sicko... I'm not sure what her point is, but the officer said other workers at the theater just laughed at her. Thank goodness no one believes it. I mean, what if someone I knew was there, and happened to hear this lady say John Parker was her baby daddy??

I trust him more than I've ever trusted before (you have to when he's in people's homes all day long...and I don't mean just their living rooms. People get cable in their bedrooms, too.), and I know where he is every minute of the day.

I am not angry at this girl, really - in fact, I down right feel sorry for her. The girl seems so desperate...She knows he's married now...maybe that's why she did it. hmmm..

Speaking of sad - John went to a lady's house to install her cable, and she didn't have the COD. John was about to leave, since she didn't have the money, and she apparently broke down in tears...She said there was a COD, because the cable was in her daughter's name, but her daughter had fled the state, because she was in trouble. Since the daughter wasn't there - she couldn't transfer the cable into her name.

In the midst of her tears, she told John that he just didn't understand. she had to have her cable, and she would do anything.

ANYTHING....

Catch my drift?

Thankfully, he just left without saying a word.

Is it the water?

I seriously have NO idea what's going on, but this is crazy.

First of all, please continue to pray for Troy. His tumor markers are extremely high right now. The highest they've been ever. He had a really bad weekend, but hopefully some adjustments to medications will help him to feel better. To keep up with his story, you can Click Here.

My Aunt Helen (My maternal grandfather's sister) was recently diagnosed with Breast Cancer. I'm not sure what type, or the severity, but I do believe she will be doing radiation treatments 5 days a week for 8 weeks.

Last year, my Aunt, Joyce Kay (My dad's sister), was diagnosed with Breast Cancer as well. Again, not sure of the type, but i do know she had a mastectomy in Feb of 2008.

Yesterday, my grandmother (Mom's mom) was Diagnosed with Breast Cancer. Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. Apparently this is the most common type of BC, so that gives me hope that there is a good shot this can be taken care of. Totsie may be in her late 70s, but she's active! She's not an "old" 70.



Lord, I'm not sure what is going on with my family right now, but I just ask you to please lay a hand of healing on them. I boldly ask that you keep them around on this earth with us with no suffering, and no more pain. Lord, each of them has so much life left in them, and I know that they can touch others with their stories. I ask that you be with the rest of the family too, so that we can stand by them, and support them in any way they need. Help us to be strong, and to just be an encouragement to them, so that they never give up on life, or on You. We love you Lord, and know that YOU are the Great Physician, and that healing is a business you will always be in. Please heal Aunt Helen, and Troy, and Totsie.

Debt Free, and it feels good...

Almost there. here's the story..

In August 2000, i got married to S. By our 3rd wedding anniversary, we had racked up some MAJOR debt.

Define "Major", you say?

18 Credit Cards.
21 Creditors.
2 new computers.
1 new house.
1 new car.
new couches for the new house.
new bedroom furniture.
new refrigerator.
Hospital Bills
Doctor Bills
Student Loans...

Is that enough? I'd say so.

With just the Creditors, we were over $60,000 in debt. (not including cars, house, computers, doctors, student loans...yadda yadda yadda...)

It was depressing. We paid what we could, but it wasn't much. The car fell behind. The house fell behind. One by one...credit cards were becoming later and later and later. We really did what we could. We cut our eating out down to almost nothing, we cut off cable, and really, not one morsel of food was wasted. There were nights of coming home to no electricity because we couldn't pay the bill. We borrowed money from parents on countless occasions just to make ends meet. We knew we couldn't afford to sell the house, because there's so much money involved in that. Besides, to get back into an apartment would require a credit check. Need I say more about that? Our car wouldn't fit us, our stuff and our two dogs, so we stayed with the house.

Our phone rang constantly from 8 am to 9 pm with rude, harassing creditors telling us how bad our credit was going to be messed up, and my response was always the same. "You're not going to make it any worse than it already is."

A couple of loans ended up defaulting, and with some more borrowed money, we got a computer paid off.

Finally, when we couldn't take it anymore, we tried some financial counseling, but it wasn't a fit for us and the situation we were in. For you Dave Ramsey fans out there - if it works for you - great. keep it up. It wasn't feasible for us to work the way he thinks you should live your lifestyle.

We finally asked around, and decided to step out on a limb, and try a debt consolidation company. There are a lot of scammers out there, so we had to be very careful. I made a phone call to Money Management International (referred to from here on out at MMI), a Consumer Credit Counseling Service company, and began the process. That was by far the best decision we ever made. It took a lot of time, and we had to gather so much information, and then proposals had to be sent to each company.

Many of the creditors agreed to the proposals, and they even lowered interest rates to almost nothing. Most of them were at 0-1%, one stayed at 17%, one was at 5% or 9%, so they were all in all pretty low. We had to sign an agreement that we would not open any other credit cards, apply for any loans, or ANYTHING that touched our credit as long as we were on this plan. If we did, they could kick us off the plan, and we were on our own again. We had so much debt that the consolidation plan payment was more than our house note each month. For nearly 5 years, that payment was made on time each and every month. Never late. Even when our house payment was 3 months behind - our MMI payment was taken care of.

MMI was so easy and friendly to deal with. If a creditor contacts you, you just refer them to MMI, and MMI deals with it.

Along the way, we've had a few troubles with one or two creditors, and one ended up taking themselves off the program, and then refused to accept a new proposal. Their loss for that time.

Here it is - April 2, 2009, and S made the final payment to our Debt Consolidation Company yesterday. No April Foolin' here.

It.
Is.
Finished.
Oh.
My.
God.

And God is who I owe this to. Without His help, we couldn't have done this. Not only did we keep this up through a major move from Houston to San Antonio, but we managed to keep it going through one of the toughest times ever - our divorce. No matter what, God always provided for us. We had a car up for sale that we ended up being able to keep - we were able to sell our house in a fairly short amount of time, and now we are seeing the rewards.

We have one more credit card to pay off, and it will be paid off in a matter of a couple of months, and then we're done. S was gracious enough to let me skip a few payments when times were tough for me financially on my own, so I will make those up at the end. I can't wait for the day I put that last amount of money into S's account, and then i can actually say "I'm debt free..." It will feel like I just got a huge raise.

Both of us have actually been able to finance cars in these last months of the plan, because our credit shows most of those credit cards paid off.

I can say this: (and this is my advice - ) If you are able to have a credit card that you pay off each and every month, NO MATTER WHAT - more power to you. That's awesome. If you can't pay your debt off each month - I would highly suggest you stay clear of the credit cards. If you don't have the money for it, don't buy it. Everything I buy now is paid for when I walk out of the store with it.

With all that being said, here is a link to a pretty great video that sums it all up. I'm sorry I couldn't add it straight to the blog...

Enjoy!

Stay out of Debt Video (Seriously - watch it...)